I appreciate language. I appreciate simplicity. I also appreciate sound. I reworked an earlier poem, focusing on language. This creation fails on many levels, but seeing words unseen brings light to new ideas.
I enjoy the word ardent and rime, but I am not sure refulgency or atmospheric phenomenon have any place in poetry. At least...no place in this poem. I think the simplicity of the original, as seen below the rework, weaves a much better portrait.
Many thanks to the Pub of dVerse Poets for their prompt. This was fun.
Sitting in the ardent
Before the refulgency
Dips too deep
And the rime
Creeps back in
A moment too momentary
Has come to impose
A moment to momentary
Posted for Dverse Poets--Logophilia